Cars you hated and hope not to see again

[Warren t claim]

A few spring to mind.

The first was a 1999 Metrocab with the Ford 2.5di motor and an autobox. I'll reserve the tale of how much hatred I had for that vehicle in my taxi thread at a later date.

The next two managed to piss me off so much they went far beyond my usual weighbridge disposal method. They were transported (at my expense) to my local fire station so they could suffer from being tortured by fire and being cut apart before death.

1982 Peugeot 305 1.5SR estate. A fucked ring gear meant it was eating starter motors, that's on the rare occasion when turning the key would send charge to the starter in the first place. It also embarrassed me when someone tried to steal it in Burnley because on several previous occasions my joyrider fave, RS1600i was parked in the same place and was never touched. I remember phoning customer services at Haynes Manuals to demand why such a fundamental job as starter motor replacement wasn't in their manual. The guy on the other end of the line didn't believe me until he looked for himself.

1985 Volvo 340 1.4GL. Endless carb problems. Snapped its propshaft which is a cunt of a job due to the rear mounted gearbox. Drivers seat back sheared off requiring strategic placing of a nest of tables behind the drivers seat just to get home. Eventually limped it to the fire station after the pressure plate in the clutch shit itself.

[Broccoli]

Didn’t want to negative the ‘cars you want / would have again’ thread...

Moderns I'd love to own
Lotus Elise - still affordable but getting pricey, especially for a S1...

I did the S1 when I still lived in Wales and then an S2 over here in the US.
I got misty eyed thinking about the time I owned one but quickly remembered it all again. I should have just borrowed one.

On the track they are a great laugh, as long as you have the talent for catching the quick spin when pushing it, or the space that it doesn’t matter.

On the road, it is small, not particularly quick in a straight line, bumpy, an arse to get into and out of, uncomfortable, great steering feedback (which can get tiresome on long trips), the upright rear window makes for some weird reflections in the windscreen at night and frankly not the greatest of drives due to its ‘all or nothing’ nature and catch me if you can on the edge handling. The hood, once you take it on and off a few times, you find you can never be arsed to do it so either leave it in a heap, or on the car.

Comparing that to a Westfield or Caterham, which is probably slower, so not particularly quick in a straight line, bumpy, an arse to get into and out of, uncomfortable but... so controllable on the throttle and on the edge of handling it makes you feel like a driving legend, getting the back to slide just controllably at 30 around a bend... The roof is a couple of fasteners and roll it back. Want rid of the doors? Just pull them upwards. To me the sweet spot was the X-flow engines as the carbs sound great and the exhaust can burble if you like that sort of thing. Just a nice combination of torque for the weight and power enough for the road. Front end gets light at 90 with the swoopy wings, but so what, it’s meant for the B roads rather than the fast lane of the motorway sorry er... autobahn.

[youtube][/youtube]

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

The S1 Elise is the biggest pile of overrated shit Lotus ever built. They replaced the fantastic FWD Elan that was fast, comfortable with great handling and none of the vicious oversteer of the Elise. Of course, everyone is a driving god and can tame the Elise. Yeah, right. Oh, and it’s powered by a kettle.

A half decent MX5 is a much better idea.

[SiC]

Basically I like all the cars Rev hates

I was very impressed with a mates S1. They are a completely different animal to an MX-5 (he's owned and daily both). He was considering selling it to buy one of the very last Elises but his wife is quite keen to get a F-Type herself instead of selling the Elise. I would be very keen to buy it as it's been well looked after in the 15 years he's owned it. It'd require selling quite a few of my cars to fund and justify it though.

Problem is, a second hand Evora isn't much more which is a far better car again. Except it's not a convertible.

Screenshot_20210506-083234.png (2.38 MiB) Viewed 2305 times

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Mercedes A180d - generation before the present

Cheap nasty interior. No steering feel.

The Renault sourced engine was unrefined rattly mess and slow.

...a fucking Qashqai.

All the same stuff. The A Clarse is a style thing, built as cheaply as possible and sold for as much as possible to clueless 26 year old vape monkeys and tramp stamped TOWIE type birds.

Even my in-laws C-Class interior isn't much better. Full of shiny Piano black plastic that I'm sure looks great in a show room but scratched to hell after a years use. Fit and finish in our A4 is far superior to their C-Class. Just stuff like pushing the shiny plastics in the Merc has them flexing from their mounts.

A friend of mine replaced a 2006 C220d estate with a 16 plate one because his wife wanted something newer. He admits he prefers the older car. It cost £17,000 to change.

[SiC]

Pre lockdown I have thought about hiring a Morgan 3 wheeler from the factory for the day. Unfortunately it appears they've removed that option at the moment.
https://www.morgan-motor.com/hire/

[Hooli]

I don’t like RWD anyway

GHEY!!!!!!!!!!

[SubPar]

E30 318i Touring, another car I was enthusiastic about getting but marred by an aftermarket immobiliser that had a mind of its own and made the car an unreliable nightmare. Never knew if it would start when you needed it to and with a habit of activating while you were hoofing up the motorway. Not fun.

Pug 306 bought in a hurry after we sold our Range Rover and tbf anything was likely to be a comedown afterwards. A gutless 1.4 petrol Meridian which seemed to take forever to wind itself up to motorway speeds but I feel it was a good car, just the wrong version of it.

Mk1 Eunos which I loved for a while but developed an irritating electrical fault which fucked me off to the point of binning it. It was also the only car that I had bought to that point without telling my mrs and she always hated it because of that.
Spent a load of cash on JDM goodies for it but even pre trouble I just never gelled with it the way I’d hoped, I enjoyed my Smart Roadster miles better in every way.

I've never tried an E30, but I've quite liked both E36s I've had so far...

You definitely did have the wrong version of the 306. I've never heard a good thing said about the 1.4s in them. The XUD and HDi ones I owned were great fun and had enough grunt to get out of their own way. Lovely handling wee things, with the properly French squishy suspension and seats. I reckon even a 1.6 petrol would be adequate if not exactly exciting.

I'm one of these weirdos who doesn't 'get' MX-5s. I had a mk2 for a year and it drove me mad. Short-geared, buzzy, noisy, and uncomfortable. Great when you wanted to drive it hard, just plain irritating the rest of the time. I suppose if I had the means to store it and only use it when I wanted to go for a proper thrash, maybe it would work. Trying to use it as a car for car things just didn't add up though. Maybe it's down to living in NE Scotland and requiring something with actual suspension travel for the state of the roads round here.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Basically I like all the cars Rev hates

I was very impressed with a mates S1. They are a completely different animal to an MX-5 (he's owned and daily both). He was considering selling it to buy one of the very last Elises but his wife is quite keen to get a F-Type herself instead of selling the Elise. I would be very keen to buy it as it's been well looked after in the 15 years he's owned it. It'd require selling quite a few of my cars to fund and justify it though.

Problem is, a second hand Evora isn't much more which is a far better car again. Except it's not a convertible.
Screenshot_20210506-083234.png

You haven't driven it hard enough. They grip grip grip BANG - and it's gone. I remember parking around the back of HR Owen in London in their service/bodyshop overspill - I counted eleven damaged ones. I drove one around Bedford Autodrome once. I hated it. Not quite as awful as a Caterham but absolutely vicious oversteer and too much like hard work. It's only on track you realise just how much nicer the MX5 actually is. They're so forgiving.

I'm told the S2 is a far better idea, but like 911's the old ones are 'better' even though they definitely are not.

[treehugger]

I don’t like RWD anyway

GHEY!!!!!!!!!!

What's so good about RWD then? Go on.